Delhi Tides

Finally I get to blog once again.

Now an IBM R50 does not come with a FDD or a CDRW so what it implies is that unless I have a detachable USB memory device I would be left stranded to decide as to how the hell can I transfer a document from my dearest, cutest, sweetest, nicest lappie to another comp in the Cyber Café. And since I am staying at a friend’s place here in Delhi hogging all the way from dawn to dusk asking my hosts to pay the phone bill for my sojourns on the net is the something that does not appeal to my senses yet. But today I found a Cyber Café the owner of whose has configured my lappie to his LAN and here I am.

Friends, Indians, Countrymen today I intend to speak about a very delicate topic. Its sensitivity cannot be exaggerated and its importance in the life of a fledgling MBA professional is paramount. It’s a topic very close to my heart and lemme at the very outset tell you all that I have attained a high degree of skill in this trade that I will touch upon very shortly.

It is a skill that I shall try and map on a scale called the “Bated Breath” Index. And what brings me to speak on this is the experience of a lifetime. Well simply put what I am referring to here is the skill of waiting for someone or something to arrive. And to further simplify things the lower you are on the “Bated Breath” Index the more proficient you are in waiting .The waiting could be for a phone call that does not arrive even after a dozen messages or a date who is yet to show up but the movie has begun and the sherpa at the hall lets you know that “Agla show to do ghante baad hai Shaaphji”. It could be also be for the IAS official who has to sign his name on a paper and is not in office even after confirming his presence.
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As you would have guessed by now few skills help you across IAS officials and Girlfriends alike and hence the significance to know how to score as low as possible on the “Bated Breath” Index. Scoring low on the Index lets you relax, tells you how to be not restless even if you have to wait from dawn to dusk. It just lets you go to the loo when you have to and not every now and then simply becos it is an activity that kills the waiting time.

I recently had the distinction (dubious if you like) of having the “Shortest First Day at DoCC” in SPJIMR history. And that’s exactly when the genesis of this post took place. The waiting time that day was two hours and five minutes to be precise. I was there at the headquarters of an NGO called Prayas at 9:25 a.m. and was sitting rooted in a chair at the reception till 11:30 a.m. expecting a certain Ms. Anupama to grace the office.

And this was again only one of the many occasions when I have displayed utmost skill in waiting with as less of a bated breath as possible. And at this moment of time I feel competent enough to pen a few tips to score as low as possible on the famed Bated Breath Index.
1.) Carry a bag always: You can carry something to eat and read. Though eating might not always be acceptable yet some situations give you a room to yourself as was the case when I went to meet an IPS officer in Mumbai for a signature on a certain verification form. This was the longest I had to wait for anyone and I luckily had a few cakes and an Aquafina in my bag. I could not have left the room for a second lest the officer come, pick his tiffin box and leave.Oh yeah I had made a rapport with a peon and was told that “Saab tiffin box chhod ke gaye hain.Waapas aayenge”. Flimsy as it might sound now at that point of time such bits of information from reliable sources offer a new lease of life and hope
2.) It might be prudent if you are stationed in a vocation that does require you to wait more than others (let’s assume you have an outsourcing firm that provides services like “Making getting signatures from Bureaucrats Easy”) to have a mobile service provider that allows you free outgoing SMS’s.
3.) I would also recommend not carrying anything to drink cos no matter whatever the office be it will always have a good source of water. After all bureaucrats need to drink pure water and stay healthy more than others.
4.) Read all instructions written everywhere on the walls. I have an interesting tale to narrate in this regard.
Having got bored of waiting for too long in the room that I just mentioned above I decided to go to the loo. This was less of a time killing tactic and more of a necessity. There was another gentleman in a creamy Safari Suit at the wash basin where I began a customary routine of washing my hands and no sooner than I had picked up the soap that he shot a stern glance at me.
“Sorry Sir, I dint know it was your soap”, I said.
The gentleman continued his glare almost to suggest that I was the underground criminal who had murdered his daughter. And while I was wondering vulnerably looking at him as to what could allay his apprehension of some infected human having spoiled his unadulterated soap he finally spoke after what seemed an eternity.
“Did you not read the instructions on the door” a gruff voice boomed.
Now I have been to many loos before. And afaik restrooms/toilets/loos whatever you call them seldom had instructions on the door. They sure did have a figure resembling a bald man or a girl who had her hair in two knots. This restroom did not have these pictures but I was sure I had entered the one that said “He”. Further proof of the same was the presence of this man himself under the same roof as I. So what the heck was wrong?
I spent the next two seconds mumbling something in the nature of “No Sir, I did not read anything.”
“Its written in pure Marathi and you couldn’t even read that”. The venom in his voice was growing by the word.
Damn. How was I supposed to know that the two sentences I did see indeed on the door of the restroom were instructions and not endorsement one liners in Marathi for 502 Pataaka Beedi?
“This is meant only for employees here.” Oracle spoke again.
I was just glad it was not the issue with the Soap and walked out sheepishly.
5.) And probably the most relevant .Always let the other person know through a call that you are coming. Regardless of whether you still find him there or not it’s important to let him know if you can.

Punctuality is something that I have learnt from my Dad. To the minute. And I can say with a fair bit of pride that I have inherited that trait of his to the T. But as Anurag has said in his blog just like the best of babes roam with the shittiest of guys, the most punctual of us stand outside the bureaucrats offices.

Happy Waiting!

In and Out!

"Jeez ....Comprees are over and I am finally home" I said to myself on the doorstep of my home on 15th night.

They say Heavens are hard to reach
They say Heavens are nice to be in
They say Heavens are meant for good people

Well I say ... Heaven must be a home.

Drat!!!!
Chuck the poet in you Issac .Its not even there for that matter.

48 hours later : A very short and sweet stint at home.Too short maybe.
Out of SP Jain and still on the move.
Off to Delhi tumro for a DoCC Project .
Woooohoooooooo!!!!

Heavy Heavy Fuel

1st March, 6:40 p.m. -Started FM Preparation for End Term
2nd March, 4:40 a.m-Done with FM.Off to sleep. Unprepared as ever.
2nd March,8:00 a.m.- Alarm rings.Preparation for FM End Term Second Phase.
2nd March, 10:25 a.m.-At the exam venue. Cool as ever
2nd March,12:40 p.m. - Exam over. Shitty as ever.
Phew ...that ended 4 tortuous days of exams coming in the midst of an onslaught of assignments and group works.And the first thing that comes to my mind after the exam is my bed.That beautiful furniture that stays littered with - as I see now a water bottle,a Prasanna Chandra piled over 4 past issues of Cricinfo, a couple of blank CD's (strictly not for what way Naina thinks boys use blank CD's for),a laptop bag, a pair of jeans and a cell and a laptop charger. Time to run to the hostel,order a plate of Schzewan Noodles and sleep like there's no tomorrow.
2nd March, 1:20 p.m-In my hostel room all set to fulfil my ruminations
2nd March,1:40 p.m. "Lets go out for lunch to Arfa", asked Aditya
"Umm.. Errr.. okie lets go"
2nd March,3:20 p.m. Back after a heavy lunch .All set for a siesta."Lemme check my mails before I sleep"
2nd March,4:10 p.m. - "Dude, we got to see the Aviator.Its a sexy movie",said Nikhil
2nd March, 5:45 p.m. - Watching "The Aviator"
3 rd March,12:10 a.m. -Back to the hostel.Vivek lurking near my room
3rd March,3:25 a.m. -Still chatting with girls on Ip and doing a double team with Vivek to fool around on Ip.
3th March, 11:00 a.m.- Planning for Farewell in Aranyak's room.
3th March, 2:00 p.m. - Plan of Action prepared.
3th March, 6:00 p.m.- Fresh after a sleep .
3th March, 9:30 p.m.- Out for dinner.
4th March, 12:05 a.m.-Beginning work on the farewell presentation with Sameer.
4th March, 5:45 a.m. Still working on the presentation.Partners in Crime-Abhi,Anurag,Martin,Aranyak and Madhu
4th March, 9:20 a.m.- Martin wakes me up.Partners unite again in ten mins for the presentation
4th March,5:15 p.m-Still working on the presentation
4th March,6:25 p.m. - Farewell Program begins in Bistro.Me doing a 100 meter sprint back to the insti after a quick shave and a round of deos.
4th March,10:45 pm- Dinner with partners in crime.Best time of the day.No Kulfi in stock but mirth and laughter all around.
5th March,12:20 a.m.-Bliss......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!
5th March, 11:30 a.m. -Up from sleep. OM,FM and IB pending
5th March,1:45 pm.- Ironing T-Shirt for the Knoplfler Concert
5th March,9:20 p.m.- God sings "Romeo and Juliet"
5th March,10:45 p.m.-Lady in the white top and denim skirt exchanges a glance for eternity( read approx 4.7 seconds)
6th March,01:40 a.m. -Begin work on FM assignment.
6th March,03:45 a.m.- Sleep ...Finally!
6th March, 9:30 a.m.- Submit FM and begin work on OM assignment.
6th March ,3:00 p.m.-Submit OM assignment and off for lunch
6th March,5:40 p.m.- "No,Sir House Full for 6 p.m.Next show at 9"- Guard at the Prithvi theater.
6th March, 9:00 p.m-Seated in Prithvi
6th March, 10:20 p.m.- Jameel Khan acting like no body's business
6th March ,11:45 p.m.-Begin IB assignment
7th March ,3:20 a.m. - Submit IB assignment.

Insane is one word , hectic is another but paranoid come closest to describing the events in the last 4 days. Its been one heck of a rollercoaster ride in the last 9 months and as the dying moments of PGP-1 fade out day by day I am reminded of an array of grades , great friends , staging a play, making presentations,dancing with orphaned children,group works and somewhere along the way also fighting for Harsha's spot...it had everything.
This post is only a reflection of a what we at PGP-1 have gone through the whole of the last month and its been a pleasure to be riding that wave.

6 more exams and all 148 of us would have survived and as I think of the first four days that we spent here I cannot help but think ....
"This too shall pass" : )

Something on my mind

I dont react much.. I dont express much .. I never let the other person know what I am thinking.. And I succeed day in and day out..
But I just saw the semi finals of "Harsha Ki Khoj " on ESPN about 5 mins back.. and I am not angry .
I am not sad.
And I am not frustrated.
I was only doing my IB assignment .
And I am just......
"Aaaaaarrrrrrrgggggggggggggghhhhhhhh......."!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Days will be back again!!!

The Whole Nine Yards

17th February,2005 1:35 a.m.
"One last time lets rummage through that stage for Arun's cell ..."
I said . The very stage around which we had just spent two of the most beautiful hours in last 7 months at SPJain. We went beneath the stage , eyes were trying hard to stay open but yes they were wide open. "Check for the cell on the stage too" said Alok. We did. The cell was not to be found.
What this searching exercise did though was make Vivek sit on the edge of that beautiful rectangular 25X20 feet block for one last time this year. "What must he be thinking ? " I asked myself. And I heard a whistle from behind. Pretending not to notice I turned my neck in a quick detour. The whistle continued for a while and then I heard a voice that was similar to Shweta's ."Ah there she is .." "Jaaoo... its too late " . We knew it was .But something just pulled us back. Something was special about that stage .It made you feel stay back,not leave that place and not get up.I sat for a moment too.
The End.
Time to go back.And in your eyes picture whatever happened in the last 34 days.I hate the word 'Commitment' . I'd rather go by 'Desire'. A desire to excel and a Team to die for. Thats all I see looking back. I dont see grades ,I dont see cheating and I dont see cribbing.
I see Rajeev sending out mails to his Mob to gargle everyday and asking them to not let him down in front of the other 24 Gaspians.
I see KP responding with a voice that he himself can barely hear because its gone hoarse but yes we in the room can and so can our batchmates in the Group Work room and Girls Hostel.
I see KSP rushing after a workshop ending at 8 straight to the venue for practice and not getting out in between until we are all out at 1 a.m. the next morning.
I see Anish being dot at 8 p.m. everyday at the venue knowing that he could be the first to arrive and will have to wait for another 30 minutes before anything takes off.Oh yeah he was also the first to unleash the spirit of unadulterated passion of Gasp with his maddening first dialogue.
I see Ankush missing his lunch and nodding in a manner that would put a compass to shame. 360 degrees is no more the extent of convolution.His 'Nod' suggests there could be yet evidence that humans continue to challenge well established norms in Mathematics.
And I see Hari coming for practices extending for as long as five hours to speak 3 sentences because the Mob would not be complete without him .
I see Farhan and I see brilliance in method and madness. I see him worried not for himself but for me cos I could forget my next dialogue in the raucous and the play could come tumbling down.
I see Nikhil practice in the Audi,in the class and even when the dress rehearsal is on in the GASP room. I see him improvise to perfection and I bet he would still be wondering about ways to say that dialogue once again.
I see Natasha not going home on Wednesdays and sitting in a corner all alone remembering her dialogue.
I see Gitanjali cutting her calls midway . I see Gitanjali coming to practice on the day her aunt passed away and not make a mention about it to anyone.Just that some of us saw her sobbing midway through the practice.
I see Indu trying to get the best out of every character. I see her arguing for more practice hours and see her googling in class for that perfect design on the poster.
I see Anindita doing everything she has been asked to effortlessly and not cribbing about being asked to show different emotions on the same scene.
I see Megha waking up at 6 a.m. for being a volunteer for Placements and after doing a helter-skelter all throughout the day still coming at 8 p.m.for the practice sessions. I see her spread her infectious laughter all over the place and wreak havoc with her restlessness.
I see Alok giving up Basketball for 34 consecutive days and seeing his mobile balance dwindle by 200 bucks in a week.
I see Rekha scouting for that pen that I specifically ask for and the writing pad that Ramnik demands. I see her in the Bistro, in Dome I and back in GASP room in less than 30 seconds.
I see Parinaz bringing the prayer caps from a store called 'God Knows Where' and making the stage a place I wish Heaven could emulate.
I see Sachin frantic and going crazy because people were asking for extensions .I see him coming into my room at 3:30 a.m. and temme that we are running behind schedule and I see him sleep in every class that he attends cos his mails go out at 4:26 in the morning.
I see Aranyak,the freak just get what we wanted him to get.Crazy Sounds Beware. A simulation of someone tuning a radio on ???? Gimme a break! Oh the directors dint like it so you can change it? You can do it? What ?? You can do that too??
I see Sujith just come there and be a part of it . I see him make his own space.I see him in Lights, arranging chairs , getting e-mail id's.
I see Surabhi bring us a hoard of costumes and make up neatly piled and claiming. "Take your pick.. if you dont like it we have something else and if not this then that and that..."
I see Eashwari pepping us up and playing the caretaker for everyone.I see her to invoke a smile on my face and temme that "Yes GASP is fun!!!"
I see Anurag and ... need I say more..
I see Soundarya count every rupee, ask for every bill and sit for two hours in a cross legged position with a torch for three days in a row .I see her lose her cell too and yet make no fuss about it and go back to the hostel with a smile on her face.
I see Arun take prints one after the other. Rush out of the GASP room and come back in. And then rush out again.I see Arun telling me.. "We are the best man!! ".
I see Naina throwing water on her face after shes spend over an hour burning the edges of chart paper . I see her sweat and burn so that the cast is riding over a successful wave of publicity when it comes on stage.
I see Suchi write,write and write .Beautifully as ever . I see her telling me "No ..Issac I know I have nothing to do now but I just want to see you all practice".
I see Shweta bring us a Cake out of the blue . I see her smile when everything has just gone right and I see her smile even more when everything has just gone wrong and I see her make everyone feel special.

And I see again Vivek sit on that rectangular block of 25X20 feet and say to myself "What must he be thinking ? "

And I see myself hugging everyone and jumping like a madman after the play.
Its some fun being on the moon Huh? : )

Hiatus

Blame it on GASP,ADMAP Brochure, ABK, P&P ,OM, ,BP, ,SI, FM, and SD in that order. Have thought about what my next post should be though.Chances are it will veerrroooommmm around Narain Karthikeyan.

With the free space that this blog provides me on the WWW I can finally give vent to my ruminations on the world of Sport and at this point of time not entirely rule out the possibility of my writing in "The Wisden" or " Sports Illustrated" some day. Not only has globalisation as every teacher here keeps blabbering about changed the face of India, given rise to more trade , led India on the pathway to a new world..blah..blah ..blah.. ,it has also widened my horizon of ambition that until some time back used to extend only till seeing my name in print in "Cricket Samrat" and "Khel Ki Duniya"..Oh dont be surprised not for nothing do they say Cricket is a crazy game.The accusation shall continue till we have a few like yours truly around.

Lately I have also been observing people around my seat in class do all sorts of crazy things to the schedule that is sent by the ‘Her Highness’ to the batch. Some colors going into the unoccupied empty boxes in Excel, some tags to almost every box in Excel, some macros also being embedded. So much so that I had trouble figuring whether some schedules around me were being sent personally by ‘Her Highness’. We get our schedule in Excel format and one that I saw resembled a Word doc. A friend beside me ,I thought was hypnotized by the schedule .I caught him staring at the schedule on the monitor for more than any accepted levels of normality. Things that people get driven by... An excel sheet??? That comes every week!!!

Have a test on BP the day after and when my priority list did come and stall at BP today,I did a sneak peek on those chapters that lie ahead and came across a gem in one of the chapters.

"Strategic Fit among many activities is fundamental not only to competitive advantage but also to the sustainabilty of that advantage."

Profound..

Thankfully only profound!

Coincidential Nods

One of my favourite quotes that I have seen on a T-Shirt:

"24 hours in a day;24 beers in a case ...Coincidence? "

I take the liberty to reframe it thus :

"Standard Deviation is abbrievated as S.D.; So is Suranjan Das ... Coincidence?"

I say not and unlike the original quotation mind you the answer to my framed quotation is not so obvious.For no matter whatever the topic be ,it is a given that whatever our famed academician-cum-teacher has to offer is unrelentingly deviating from a standard that I am as of now clearly yet to match

I shall restrict the scope of this post to the proceedings in the classes that I attend here and try as I might I cannot elminate some of the events that take place in Quant classes.I shall also dwell on some other subjects in general but there's nothing like starting with your favourite punching bag.

Umm..lemme see some of my reminiscences from the classes I have attended in Quant.

Ah..Observing the peculiar length of Chandu's nose in a presentation that was used to teach us Hypothesis Testing (I believe..). Chandu was one of the four cartoon characters in the presentation and I could not help observing his contorted and funny nose while my 74 esteemed friends fought , strived and played psychoanalysts to a fair degree of perfection.Some of the pearls of wisdom were:

"Sir, Chandoo could be getting this fish for his son but another for his daughter"

"Sir, I think Chandoo's daughter goes to the gym and hence health conscious"

"Sir, Chandoo is probably telling a lie to his son and hiding something from his daughter".

My memory is not great but some things are hard to forget.

Yet after all of this I speak with a 100% confidence level for all my friends that none of my psychoanalyst champs had a clue as to how all of this was related to Hypothesis Testing.I empathise with them.Its no fun when you try hard and yet not get anywhere.And now when I look back at it I got so much a better deal in observing my favourite cartoons nose. In a Quant class that was the only thing that got me thiking.This is why I do not attribute the SD abbrievation of Standard Deviation and Suranjan Das to coincidence.The deviation of his views ,thoughts and comments to mine are standard and frightening.

One of my friend's views on SD's mode of teaching are startling.For a man of his composure this is what he has to say :

"My dear friend.. I have never studied Maths like this before.It is all 'Bool Sheet' "

Another one had a more philosophical outlook:

"No one knows what he teaches.All of us follow him like blind men." Playing the psychoanalyst was so evidently getting to his nerves.

So how do you deal with a class that is deviating from you with a vengeance?

I suggest using the "Nod Theory".

Nod to the left and nod to the right.Nod when bored and nod when fried.(Grrr...I am not a poet.This is closest rhyme I could come up with)

With personal experience I vouch with all my might the usefulness of the theory in classes like OM and P&P.Now like every term that I have learnt in MBA there are classifications here too.

There is the "Intellectual Nod" when all you need to do is keep nodding within a space of 15 seconds.The utility is incomparable and maximum when the teacher is looking right in your eyes.

Then we have the "Oh Now I understand Nod.." Dont mind the timing .It is imperative that the nod is accompanied by a face expression that should read " Realization has dawned NOW. I understand NOW.All my doubts are cleared NOW".In my seventeen years of eduaction I have not seen a more masterful exponent of this art than our very own Abhijeet Deshmukh.I feel his nod is genuine all the time.But if you can replicate it you have an explosive device in your arsenal to stave off those teachers.

Then there is the "Mixture of All Other nods" .This is the simplest of them all.Nod and Nod as if your life depends on it.Sideways movement of the head is a critical feature.This one comes with a drawback that if you overuse it you could be in for a rough time.I once got into trouble with this one in SD's class

But take my word this is an all-season all-teacher tested tool.And the best for my money in a P&P class.



There are some things I really like about our batch. Its bonded well over the last 7 months and each of us here is special and it shines through on occassions.Today was one such occassion.The Sports Day and the particular reference is to the Tug-of-War competition. Nothing on earth can match being a part of the gang that is pulling its power to force another gang to come over its side.The will to do so at the fag end of the day with all your might is something that all of us can be proud of while we cling glasses in ten minutes from now.

Anish.. time to go...